They say that you should never begin a speech, sermon, lesson, or essay with an apology or explanation. Well, I am going to do that anyway and 'they' can just stuff it.This is probably the hardest single topic that I have written on yet. I guarantee it will offend many who read it and that saddens me. I do not apologize for the offence because this is a topic that should get out in the open and be discussed. If you read this, I urge you to make a strong effort to really think about what is being said and don’t just jump to conclusions. Also, be aware that I address each side and the issues for both. This is NOT one-sided by any stretch of the imagination. I truly don’t expect much from this. Most people will only read this from their point of view and be angry as soon as I question one of their beliefs. With that said, I have felt a deep need to open this discussion up as it affects my relationships with quite a few people.
I have not written in some time, due to work load at the Church and in my masters program. But, also, I’ve been working on-again-off-again on this blog. I wanted to be sure that I said everything as clearly as possible. I wanted to get it right.
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Who will go to them?
This was the clarion call of Christian missionaries in the 19th and 20th century. Whoever the people group, there were willing missionaries, people who went out in God’s love. Now, I won’t romanticize it too much, I know there were bad apples, but the truth is, it didn’t matter how remote the people group was, it didn’t matter how dangerous they were, it didn’t matter what their customs were; Christians went to them to show Christ’s love. They crossed mountains. They went across vast oceans. They went to lepers. They went to tuberculosis communities. They went to cannibals. They went to places where they knew they would never come home from.
While that fervor has diminished some, and taken with it some of the colonial and racial issues that some missionaries took with them; there still are missionaries who go out today. They fill practical human needs like food for the hungry, medical aid, education for women, and fighting modern-day slavery. They bring love. They go to parts of the world where it could mean imprisonment, beatings, and death for the work they do. But still they go.
Everywhere. Except for one place.
To Everyone. Except for one people group. One social group.
These people are treated as unacceptable, untouchable, unsavable.
The Bible says, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish” No one is excluded, so long as they believe in Him.
Yet we exclude one group.
Jesus says, “Therefore go make disciples of ALL nations…” There is no exception clause in that statement.
Yet we have created an exception to that.
My heart tears over this issue. I am sure God’s does too.
If you haven’t figured it out yet, the people that I am referring is the GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered) community.
I have friends and relatives who are part of this group. I say that not to be cliché, “some of my best friends are black people.” No, I say that to be clear about why I struggle with this issue and why my heart is broken over it.
The worst part of this situation is that there are two distinctly polarized sides who have made up their mind and aren’t interested in dialog. On one side, you have people like the Phelps in Kansas who picket funerals with signs like “God Hates Fags.” For the record, I do NOT consider them Christian and they do NOT speak for me. I have written on this before. Click here to read about that.
The other side has its militants too. Those who are in-your-face and angry picketing churches, force people to resign from public office for holding opinions that disagree with them, and other similar behavior.
These two groups of people aren’t interested in truth, reconciliation, or mercy. They won’t change their minds, they don’t want to be distracted by silly things like truth or facts. This article is addressed to everyone else.
The first casualty of any conflict is truth and the first step to reconciliation is honesty.
Both sides are guilty of lies. Both sides are guilty of marketing that twists the facts.
Here are some observations that I believe to be the truth:
1. Jesus loved sinners, no matter what they had done. He hung out with regular people, as well as traitors, liars, prostitutes, and thieves. He was gentle but firm and truthful in love with these people. The ONLY people he got angry with and rebuked were the religious leaders who were hurting others with their pious hypocrisy. I believe that, if Jesus were here in the U.S.A today, we’d be more likely to encounter him on the streets around Berkley than anywhere near most churches. This is not because most churches are bad, but because He was active with the real people in His community when He was here last time.
2. The Bible is quite clear that the act of homosexual sex is considered a sin, something that God did not intend for us to do. I can’t get around that. I have seen lots of attempts at explaining it all away, but let’s just get it out in the open. If you are intellectually honest with your Greek and Hebrew, there is no doubt on this issue.
3. The Bible is also quite clear that gossip, lust, hatred, favoritism, ignoring poverty, injustice, and a number of other issues are also sin. In fact, gossip and money issues are much more than homosexuality. In James, it says that anyone guilty of breaking one of the laws of God is guilty of breaking all of the laws. A sinner is a sinner is a sinner. Jesus came to provide a way back to God for ALL sinners, not just for a few narrow ones.
4. Gay marriage is not an existing right that is being denied, but a new right that has not existed before in this nation or in almost every other. Let’s be honest about that. This is not an issue for the courts, but an issue for the ballot box. The cool thing about living in the U.S. is that we can craft new laws and make society look the way we want it. If that is something you do believe in, lobby for it, write up a proposition, and then go vote. If that is something you don’t believe in, you can vote against it.
5. Homosexuality, as with many other issues of the human condition, cannot be explained by simple sound bites about nature or nurture. Those scientists searching for the ‘Gay Gene’ won’t solve anything if they find it. One side will say, “There, that proves it, it is a disease that can be cured.” The other side will say, “There, that proves it, it is just the natural way that I am, like blue eyes and brown hair, there is nothing to cure.” And the fight will go on.
6. If you expect to be respected, you have to give respect too. I don’t care which side of this issue that you are on, you should have learned this back in kindergarten. You may feel strongly about this issue one way or another, but please understand that there are very real, heartfelt people on both sides of this issue. Any time you reach the point where it is us versus them, the other side becomes less than human and you start down the slippery slope that leads to evils done in the name of your belief system (whether religious or secular, there are plenty of examples of each). Maybe, just maybe, you could actually try to understand the other side. Maybe, just maybe you could actually seek out people on the other side and attempt to get to know them. Maybe, just maybe you could be friendly and respectful even when you don’t agree.
7. God’s concern throughout the Bible is Holiness. Yet, reading Exodus and the Gospels shows that He chose a people that were imperfect, broken, and human. He provided our Holiness in the form of Jesus. His death covers all sins of those who believe in Him, not just the ones you are comfortable with.
As I said, this is near to my heart. Someone very close to me shared her story. She told of going to evangelical churches during the time she was struggling with her sexuality. She told of hearing people make statements that told her God loved everyone but her, because she might be lesbian. She told of feeling alone in the middle of the very people who should have loved her. I interrupted her story at that point to apologize to her and tell her that it is not supposed to be that way.
She says that her wife, who I am only just beginning to get to know, is an atheist who hates God and religion because of past experiences. I don’t know her story and would not presume to judge her. I only hope that I can communicate that God does love her, as do I.
Another person that I care a great deal about is transsexual. I truly and honestly don’t understand the issues she faces, and conversations are certainly a struggle with pronouns, but I care deeply about this person. She told me last time that she probably will never be able to go to church again.
There are others, but the issues are the same. Even if they know Christ, they probably will never feel welcome at many churches; for that, I want to weep.
I also have people on the other side. I have relatives who are victims of the recent ELCA decisions. My brother-in-law lost his church because of it. A friend of mine belongs to a church who may lose their property because of it. They face a form of persecution because they do stand for God’s word when others try to redefine it.
I believe that this issue is the defining issue of the Christian church today, and will be the source of much more struggle. That saddens me.
For me, it comes down to this:
· I believe that it is possible to be gay and Christian. There are people within my congregation that are homosexual as well as ones who have had such experiences. I do not condemn them, their story is their story.
· Based on God’s word, I could not, in good conscience, perform the marriage ceremony for a same-sex couple, but I would attend such a wedding were I invited. I have attended a Muslim wedding and many secular weddings. Their beliefs may differ from mine, but that doesn’t change my love for them or my willingness to be there for them.
· I love God, believe evidentially that His Word is true and that He exists, so I will continue to follow His example and love all humankind gay or straight.
· Whether you agree with me or not, I don’t consider this issue to be a test of fellowship. I hope you won’t either. I care about you whether you are gay or straight, republican or democrat, male or female, tall or short, Lutheran or Jew, atheist or agnostic, vanilla or chocolate, or tastes great or less filling.
Here is my challenge to each of you:
If you are Christian – please don’t base your entire theology on just a few verses (for this or any other issue). Don’t be arrogant, cruel, or unwelcoming. None of that is worthy of our Lord. Examine yourself first, remove the log from your own eye before you point out the speck in your brother’s. Are you really living up to God’s Word yourself? Are you basing your beliefs on your own prejudice? Don’t miss the common theme of the Old Testament and the New Testament of God’s hatred of injustice of His love of the oppressed and the marginalized people. And, please don’t support any group, congregation, or ministry that participates in the marginalization of any group of people. I certainly won't.
If you are GLBT – don’t judge an entire people by the loud words of a few, as I won’t judge your individuals based on the obnoxious actions of the worst of your side. Also, don’t call a person a homophobe just because they do not agree with you. That is unfair and in most cases will be untrue. If your argument is strong enough, then ad hominem attacks are unnecessary. If you preach open-mindedness and tolerance, then that means you have to accept people who believe differently than you do. Don’t miss your own hypocrisy there. And, on the same issue of hypocrisy, don’t pretend that it is only Christians who may have prejudice against you. The truth is, there is stratification, bigotry, and intolerance within the GLBT community, too. There are gays who don’t like lesbians, and neither group accepts transgenders. There are those who want to quietly go about their lives that aren’t accepted by the Outers. Just be aware that humanity is messed up all over the place and not just in one group.
I pray that some healthy dialog comes out of this. I love to discuss issues. Jesus says, “blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” I would like to be a peacemaker.
This brings me back to the beginning…
Who will go to them?
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This is another issue that I invite you to speak to me in person about. I’d love to sit down over coffee and talk about it. As always, I will buy the coffee (or tea), I invite you to take me up on this.
Note – I welcome comments from readers, especially heartfelt ones. But, I will NOT publish anything that denigrates either side or anything using derogatory terms. I have no time or patience for that level of ignorance.
I couldn't agree more. It took me al long time to come to this, and I have to thank you for our conversations that have led me here. For I long time I was strongly opposed to anyone in the GLBT community. I was, in a sense a homophobe. I would get along with people just fine, but one I found out that they were homosexuals, I could never look at them the same way. For this, I am not proud.
ReplyDeleteThe first thing that really caught my attention was a few lines in a book by Stan Gaege. I didn't know it at the time, but those lines would change my whole outlook on the situtation. The most powerful of them is the question: "Would God really want her to abstain from expressing a desire that he himself allowed her to have?" For anyone interested, the book is called, "An incomplete guide to the rest of your life."
Another big part of my 'conversion' had to do with the way I saw the church treat single mothers. It was appaling to see a place so dedicated to preaching love humililate a young mother because she had sex out of wedlock. That's crap. And once I realized this, I knew there was no way that I could harbor the same feelings about the GLBT crowd.
Looking back, I don't understand how I could have been so closed minded about this issue. There are lots of people that need God's love who will never get it if we continue to section them off.
I don't have a LOT to say, just THANK YOU so much for sharing this. Thank You for the challange. I FEEL so strongly sometimes and most of the time I don't have the right words, so I just pray that God will show me the right words. Thank You for your words. I will forward on your blog next time I'm faced in this area....if that's okay. =)
ReplyDeleteGood stuff Rodger. I agree with most of what you share here. One of the challenges I see that you didn't address is that the homosexual community (like many church sects which attempt to define and worship God according to their terms and not God's)have set up churches for themselves that twist the Scriptures to deny that their sin of choice is even a sin in the eyes of God, despite what His word declares.
ReplyDeleteIn this sense they attempt to "straddle the fence" of truth so to speak, and have their cake and eat it to.
I have witnessed to this faction of the GLBT community and it is just as difficult to reach them as it is to reach a defiant Latter Day Saint or Watchtower proponent.
Thank you for the food for thought and God bless your ministry and studies.
Hi Rodger,
ReplyDeleteWell done. Thank you. It is easy to see that you have put a great deal of thought into this and you should be proud of the effort.
As a card carrying member of the GLBT community I disagree on a few points. But that is to be expected I think. Regarding point 2, and speaking only for myself, I have found it interesting how my Bible studies have become much more probing since I became part of the persecuted class. I no longer accept at face value the traditional teachings of the past. I confront them and often find today’s doctrines inconsistent with the Scriptures. I have no answers, only questions. But today I leave room for the possibility that today’s conservative Christian Doctrines need to be revised. It wouldn’t be the first time a “thou shalt not” became “thou shalt not pay attention to this from here forward.”
A lot of the animosity I see in the GLBT community comes from the failure of too many Christians to grasp your comments in point 3. The homosexual is dog doo on a shoe, worthy of recitations that include “abomination” and “detestable.” Not the case for, let's say a liar, a “Top Ten” sin AND one of the “six things God hates, seven that are detestable to Him.” (It’s interesting to me that homosexuality never comes up on these lists. I wonder why?) When was the last time an Elder was tossed for lying to his spouse? IMHO, Christians should NEVER judge, but if they must, the judgment must be equal as sin is equal. From my own experience, it is easy to be angry when one is singled out for persecution knowing that’s not the way it’s supposed to be.
In point 4, we also disagree about what Same-Sex Marriage is about. The rights are already in place, they are not new. When a man and woman get married, civil or religious, they comply with some rules set by the government and in so doing receive a cornucopia of rights and privileges as married US citizens. Same-sex couples are denied that cornucopia. That is a violation of the 14th Amendment, “No State shall …deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.” What the State does for one, it MUST do for the other. Not to do so is, IMHO, just flat wrong.
I agree with you on number 5. At the end of the day, no one knows for sure what’s going on. I was ten years old when I first moved my Mother’s clothes from her closet to mine. Ten. I can tell you this was not a choice. I was driven. Where in the world did it come from? I have no idea. Most nights I prayed this prayer, “Lord, please make me a woman or make me happy to be a man or take me home.” I just wanted to feel comfortable in my own skin. Praise His Name, He answered that prayer and that struggle is over. Unfortunately, others have taken its place.
Regarding number 6; I find myself in the interesting position within the GLBT community of being an apologist for Christianity. Too many GLBT folk paint all Christians with a brush that only one or two may actually deserve. When all the rhetoric and doctrines are stripped away individuals on both sides are sinners equally in need of a Savior. No more, no less. That should be the tie that binds us all in love and acceptance.
More later.
Billie
@ Ron I think you missed the salient points of the post. You say that the GLBT Community has “set up churches for themselves that twist the Scriptures to deny that their sin of choice is even a sin in the eyes of God, despite what his word declares.”
ReplyDeleteMost of the affirming churches I am familiar with are interested in showing acceptance and love to everyone, trying to fill a gap they think exists in many other churches. Indeed, it is not the sin they are interested in, it is salvation of the sinner.
Every church I have been a part of defines worship according to their terms. And don’t get me started on the Church’s blind eye toward Divorce, adultery and a bunch more. Christian churches have divided over differences of opinion throughout history. What are your thoughts on the Church of Christ Non-Instrumental? (Or if that is your church, go the other way.) Are they in the same camp as the homosexuals and those defiant LDS and Watchtower folks?
I will say with as much love as I can, based on this post alone, I can see why you have had trouble reaching, what did you call it, “this faction of the GLBT community.” Ron, I’m sorry, but you need to chill. “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.”
Peace,
Billie, GLBT Dischiple of Christ
Well Billie, I find myself in agreement on most of what you said, but....
ReplyDeleteI still hold firm on #4. It's an honesty issue. Your argument is a slippery slope one, because we don't allow first and second cousins to marry, we don't allow polygamy, and we don't allow a number of other 'marriage' options.
Same sex marriage has never been a 'right' in the United States and has never been understood to be one in the U.S. (or for that matter, just about any other nation anywhere in history with very few exceptions). It is for that reason that I said we have to be honest, it is a new right being requested, not the establishment of an old one.
As I see it, every man in the U.S. has equal protection under the law with the ability to marry a single woman who is not already married to another person, over 18, and not directly related by blood. Every woman in the U.S. has equal protection under the law with the ability to marry a single man who is not already married to another person, is over 18, and not directly related by blood. To change any of that is a new and separate idea that is open to our political process of lawmaking, lobbying, and voting.
I definitely agree about the church's blind eye towards divorce (and abuse, adultery, premarital sex, and adultery). I get annoyed when I hear the anti-gay marriage side say, "Gays are destroying marriage in America," as if straight people haven't already done that. I think the condition of marriage is already in a sad state that looks nothing like God's plan for it in the Bible and that preceeds any discussion of Gay marriage.
Anyway, I got longwinded (again). I invite more comments and healthy discussion.
Comments Part 2:
ReplyDeleteI weep with you that this divide has so many GLBT folks, including me, staying away from worship services. I have been to one service since August, 2007 and told the friend who had asked me to attend that I would not be back. My experience has been that too many Christians are ready to condemn me as some kind of “super sinner” and I am hard pressed why I should willingly subject myself to that.
The friend I mentioned above has asked if I would consider attending his weekly Bible Study. I am likely to do that to see how it goes. I hope it will become a bridge to the larger congregation. There are many, many wonderful Christians. I praise God that you, Rodger are one who stands up and is willing to meet and discuss this topic.
To wrap up, in a study of the Sermon on the Mount, I came upon the verse we know as the “Golden Rule,” “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.” But it was the latter portion of that verse that profoundly affected me, “for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” Elsewhere Jesus sums up the Commandments in a similar fashion, love God and love your neighbor, for “all the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Such a simple model, love God, love people.