Don't Judge Me, But......

“Please don’t judge me, but……..” In my job, I meet a lot of people who have questions. They almost always start out the conversation with a funny request. “Please don’t judge me, but…” They then go on to share some personal story about life issues and end asking what to do about the situation they are in. They want answers, but they don’t want me to use judgment. Invariably the question that they have or the situation that they are in is because of poor life choices.

Now, I know what they mean here. They don’t want me to wag a finger in their face and belittle them for being an evil sinner. I can honestly say that I have never wagged my finger in someone’s face when they came to me with such a question, but it’s funny that they seem to expect something along these lines.

“Judge not, lest ye be judged!!!” is another form of this that I hear. It seems to be the one Bible verse that everyone seems to know. They also, all seem to know the King James Version as if that makes it more powerful. This is generally said when someone has done something sufficiently awful enough that they already know it was bad and don’t want to hear about it.

Judgment.

What’s wrong with judgment.

Is it always a bad thing?

Is it ever a good thing?

When I drive up to the auto dealer and see the guy come out with the polyester suit and slick hair who gives me a price, “just cuz it’s you.” I immediately apply judgment to the situation. If not, I drive off in a junky car that I paid too much for.

When someone comes up to me and tells me that I can make money just by purchasing this box of stuff and then getting three other people under me and three other people under them and so on. I immediately apply judgment to the situation. If not, I end up with a box of cleaning supplies that no one wants and a sales bit that no one else is going to fall for.

When I open the jug of milk and it smells bad, I immediately apply some judgment. If not, I end up tossing my cookies from food poisoning. Been there, done that, got the stains on my T-shirt.

When I want to cross the road at Central and Thomas, and see the ‘Don’t Walk’ sign, I immediately apply judgment to the situation. If not, I end up squished underneath the Light Rail Train. I’m pretty sure that would hurt.

Judgment is not a bad thing, but the application or lack of application may be.

When I see a young girl who has gotten pregnant and is now having problems because her boyfriend is a jerk, I wonder why she didn’t apply a healthy helping of judgment before having sex with the guy.

When I meet someone who is in terrible financial trouble because they bought a house they couldn’t really afford, are in debt for two cars that are out of their realistic price range and have thousands of dollars of credit card debt; I wonder if the judicial use of judgment might actually benefit them.

When a guy comes complaining that his wife is divorcing him because she busted him sleeping around with her best friend, I wonder if a bit of judgment might just be in order.

Perhaps our society might do with some more judgment. Just a little smidge here and a dab there. Perhaps this is a niche industry that some entrepreneurial type might invest in. Let’s hire a bunch of older ladies in their 60s and 70s to be surrogate judgers. We could rent them out to everyday people. The grannies would follow you around and smack you in the back of the head each time you should use a little judgment.

"Hmmm. Maybe I’ll sneak out of work early today, the boss’ll never know." (((((SLAP)))))

"Hey Liz, my wife is out of town tonight, wanna go out?" (((((SLAP)))))

"Oh baby, of course I’ll love you in the morning." (((((SLAP))))) (((((SLAP))))) (one for each of them)

After awhile, Grannie wouldn't even have to slap you every time. She could just wag her finger and you'd stop and actually think about what you are doing. You might even use a little judgment.

A little judgment applied judicially at the right place and right time just might be the ticket. I really think this idea could catch on. Anyone want to take me up on the business side of this? I’ll have to copyright the idea. Maybe I’ll invest my life savings in hiring Grandmas.

(((((SLAP)))))

Ten Things in the Bible that People Always Seem to Get Wrong

Ten Things in the Bible That People Always Seem to Get Wrong

Whether it is cultural bias, twisting scripture to prove their own selfish points, or good old fashioned ignorance, there are some scriptures that people always seem to get wrong. Here are ten of the most common:

Number 10: Cleanliness is next to Godliness. Mom loved to quote scripture to get you to clean behind your ears. The problem is, it ain’t in the Bible.

Number 9: God helps those who help themselves. Nope, that ain’t in there either.

Number 8: Judge not, lest ye be judged. Matthew 7:1-5. I’ve included this in other lists. This is not an instruction forbidding wise judgment, but an instruction against hypocrisy.

Number 7: The entire book of Revelation. Lots of people read parts of this book and then figure that they know how it’s all going to end and how God is coming back. They see black helicopters and marching soldiers and the Antichrist in everybody from Hitler to Saddam Hussein to Barack Obama.

Number 6: Health & Wealth Gospel. Flip on channel 21 and chances are you’ll see someone telling you that if you have just enough faith, then God will make you rich and healthy and happy. That’s great, but that isn’t in the Bible. O, they will take various scriptures such as Isaiah 53:5 or Matthew 7:7-8 to prove their point, but only by twisting the original meaning and ignoring verses like Luke 18:18-23, 1Timothy 6:9-11 (see below) and John 15:19-20.

Number 5: 1Timothy 6:9-11 Money is the root of all evil. Actually, the verse says, that the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. Hmmmm Enron, Bernie Madoff, our current mortgage crisis…. It’s almost as if God knew what He was talking about!

Number 4: Matthew 18:19-20. Where three or more are gathered in my name, I am there with them. This is used in a lot of beautiful communion meditations to say that God is present when we meet together for fellowship. It is also used as a health and wealth scripture. But, if you take this back to Matthew 18:15-20, then you see he is speaking about discipline for those who are refusing correction, specifically, someone who has sinned against a brother and then is recalcitrant about fixing it.

Number 3: Thou shalt not kill. Another verse that everyone seems to know in the King James. It is actually a law against murder, not all killing. A soldier doing his job is not covered by this law. A person using deadly force to defend their life or the life of another is not covered by this. A police officer or an executioner doing their duty are not covered by this.

Number 2: 1Timothy 2:11-13 Women don’t serve in church. I have, at times, run into people (mostly women, believe it or not) who don’t believe that women should serve in church, speak in church, or do anything else that might smack of leadership or teaching because of this scripture. In doing so, they disregard Mary, Phoebe, Priscilla, Lydia, Junia, Deborah, Esther, and a whole mess of other ladies in the Bible who did serve God, who did lead God’s people, who did teach, preach, prophesy, etc.

Number 1: Speaking of gender issues. Ephesians 5:22-24. Wives must submit to their husbands or else!!! This verse has been used countless times as an excuse for an overbearing jerk of a husband to beat his wife, dominate her, and/or control her life. Conveniently, he will always skip Ephesians 5:21 and Ephesians 5:25-29. Men are actually held to a much higher standard of submission to their wives in these verses.

Tomorrow: Ten Books of the Bible that are Worth Your Time to Read

An Apology

This blog originally posted Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Category: Religion and Philosophy

I was reading the paper on Sunday and saw a picture that absolutely disgusted me. A funeral in Kentucky for a soldier who died in Iraq was being attended by a group of protesters. They were waiving signs that said 'God Hates You' and 'You are Going to Hell'. Reporters, interviewing the protesters found that they were representatives of a local church who believe that 9/11 was God's punishment on the U.S. for homosexuality.

Last fall, I went to the National Youth Workers Convention in California and there were protesters there too. They had parked a large truck out front covered with huge signs that said 'God Hates Fags' and such in large red letters on white background.

Let me start by apologizing for their conduct. I'm sorry and I ask for forgiveness. Please know that they do not represent all Christians, in fact, they don't even represent a majority of Christians. Jesus had nothing but love and guidance for those who were in sin. He reserved his harsh attacks for the obnoxious religious leaders who tore others down with their legalism, who preached one thing to the people and then did worse themselves. Kinda makes you wonder what he would say to those protestors.

Jesus hung out with prostitutes, traitors, and other 'sinners'. It's there in the book. He says that he came for the sick and broken. It's there. He invites you to come to him, because his burden is light. Hatred and vitriol are not what I find there.

Paul travelled to different cultures throughout the Mediterranean, teaching of Jesus to people who weren't Jews, knew nothing of God or His promised Messiah. Did he hold up signs saying 'You are going to Hades' ? Did he stand in the temple of Aphrodite and say 'God hates fornicators' ? NO. He went to them in love. He had compassion on them. He shared the truth in their language. He went to them and accepted them. Don't get me wrong, he certainly instructed the churches and believers to clean up their act, but these were people who voluntarily chose to follow God's way. However, to people who didn't know and hadn't chosen, he took a different tack.

The most common bible verse that every non-Christian knows is 'judge not, lest ye be judged'. That's great, but they don't know what follows it. It says to take the log out of your own eye before pointing out the splinter in your brother's eye. That means that I need to do some cleanup in my own life before judging someone elses. I'd certainly like to take a look into the lives of those protestors. There had better be no pornography in their house, no bad internet sites visited, no adultery in the church, no incidents of molestation, theft, gossip, slander, infighting, divorce, drunkeness, or any other things that the Bible calls sin.

Please, accept my apology for them. They do not represent me or the God that I follow.