Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Lighten Up!



“Hey Fatso, you’re a little piggy.” 

Sixth Grade.   

Mean Kids. 

It was the first time I ever remember being called fat, or even thinking of myself that way.  Looking back, I was always the fat kid in class.  Always the slow one in Phys. Ed.  Always the one uncomfortable in the clothes that didn’t fit well.  That was me: Fatty McFatterson.

There are voices now that are calling for an end to “Fat-shaming.”  They say, we should all be happy with just who we are. I am here to offer another point of view on that.

I shared the story of being called fat, because those are my credentials.  My school pictures show it.  My memories are burned with it.  I have fought my weight for years.

But please…  Don’t give me a free pass.

I don’t want it.

You see, I now volunteer at a local high school each week.  I am on campus and I have noticed something disturbing:  There is no fat kid.
 
That’s right, there is no fat kid.

There are A LOT of them.

When I was young, the fat kid was a rarity.  Now, the schools are full of them.  And, they aren’t just a little bit overweight, not just a bit chubby, or could stand to lose a pound or two.  Now, there are easily a third of these young adults who would be classified as morbidly obese! Another third are probably on their way to that classification.

There are dozens of fifteen and sixteen year old kids who outweigh me!  Most of them are even shorter than me, too.  Stop and consider what I am saying here.  High schoolers, kids, under six feet tall and weighing 250, 300 pounds, or more.  What’s more, P.E. is no longer required here in Phoenix.  The kids just have to take a health class or (get this) they can take P.E. online.  Yeah, read that again.  Physical education by sitting in front of your computer. 

This bodes ill for our future as a nation.  Type II diabetes, cancer, heart disease, back problems, knee problems, high-blood pressure, kidney disease, liver disease – all are increased with every pound you carry.

I’m not suggesting that we go back to bullying fat kids or calling names.  And yes, there is a danger of emphasizing weight and causing eating disorders, but perhaps it is time to consider that encouraging obesity or letting it be OK is not the right idea either.  It’s not heartless to do the right thing.  (or is that the light thing?)

I have a friend who is a High School P.E. teacher.  I regularly tell him, “Tomorrow, when class starts, have a fat kid run a lap for me.  Tell him it’s a gift from a fellow fat kid.”  I’m only partly kidding when I tell him that; I wish I had people who made me be a bit more active as a child.
 
It’s easy to complain about a problem, but I believe in solutions.  So here’s mine:

Let’s give something up to add in Physical Education.  Every single year of school.  Let’s get these kids out on playgrounds, into the gymnasium, running, jumping, and playing.  How about we give up algebra class.  Let’s be honest, most of these kids will never do a logarithm after high school.  Perhaps we could just start the first half hour of every single day with calisthenics, every single day of school from preschool through twelfth grade. 
 
Let’s encourage healthy eating.  Stop giving Michelle Obama trouble about pushing this as an issue.  Whether you agree with her husband’s politics or not, she is absolutely right, we must start being healthier as a nation.  Further, we as parents need to step up too.  Is it hard to offer healthy portions and healthy food.  Yes, it is.  It’s also hard getting kids to do their homework, finish their chores, and make a hundred other difficult choices.  That doesn’t excuse us from teaching those things.  Let us be the example too.  Eat your veggies and get active.  Stop eating so much fast food, and begin getting active.

It’s not a good thing for us to be so heavy as a nation.  

Let’s do the ‘light’ thing here.

Let’s lighten up.

No more fat kids.

Now, pardon me while I get up off my hypocritical butt and go work out.

Signed,
Your Friendly Neighborhood (Former) Fat Kid

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Is It Possible?



Is  it Possible?

Is it possible that Officer Darren Wilson was a great police officer who made a mistake AND Michael Brown was an innocent guy in the wrong place at the wrong time?

Is it possible that Officer Wilson was a flaming racist and made his choices based on that AND that Michael Brown was a violent thug who made his choices based on that?

Is it possible that Michael Brown was a pretty good kid who made some really dumb choices in the last day of his life?

Is it possible that Officer Wilson was in fear for his life and made a choice that he will regret for the rest of his life?

Is it possible that Michael Brown was a bully and was still innocent in this particular incident?

Is it possible that Officer Wilson could have been a bad cop but still made the right decision in this incident?

Is it possible that Michael Brown was shaped by the racism he experienced in many ways every day and that contributed to his actions?

Is it possible that Officer Wilson was shaped by white privilege and police officer training that contributed to his actions?

Is it possible that Michael Brown could have made the choice to move past his past experiences and approached this situation differently?

Is  it possible that Officer Wilson made some assumptions about Michael Brown that caused him to approach this situation in the wrong way?

Is it possible that the fact that Ferguson has a large black population but the police department is predominantly white just might have a little to do with all of this?

Is it possible that people of different colors experience the same situations differently because of their past experiences?

Is it possible that a black person could support Officer Wilson’s actions?

Is it possible that a white person could support Darren Wilson’s actions?

Is it possible for police officers to be caring people who want to help the community AND be a little too militant because of training choices?

Is it possible that black community leaders could stand up for equal treatment AND be honest about the problems generated by choices within their own community?

Is it possible that the strong police response ratcheted up the situation and that they could protect businesses without confronting the protestors?

Is it possible that black community leaders could have redirected the protests to limit the chance of large scale confrontations and criminal looting?

Is it possible that the black person standing in a crowd of predominately black protestors staring across at a crowd of predominately white police officers learns an unspoken lesson?

Is it possible that a white police officer standing in a crowd of predominately white police officers staring across at a crowd of predominately black protestors learns an unspoken lesson?

Is it possible that Al Sharpton is just as racist and unhelpful as the KKK group that was raising funds for the fallen officer?

Is it possible for both sides to be a little bit right AND both sides to also be a little bit wrong?

Is it possible that both sides are both terribly wrong?

Is it possible that MSNBC AND FOX News intentionally reported the incidents in emotional ways because they have agendas to push without regard to the truth?

Is it possible that every politician that has commented on this on both sides has made the situation worse?

Is it possible that news media like The Blaze AND Huffington Post have made the situation worse by their skewed reporting?

Is it possible that YOU are responsible for making the situation worse because you read and parrot your favorite news media without regard to the slant?

Is it possible that our culture is becoming so polarized that we cannot see broader possibilities?

Is it possible that we could all be wrong?

Is it possible that we can find a peace that doesn’t care what color or what political affiliation you are?

Is it possible to seek truth and peace at the same time?

Is it possible that YOU are reading this and agreeing, but thinking, “There’s not much I can do”?

Is it possible that everything you have read about this incident confirms what you already believe because YOU limit the input of ideas to only those that already agree with your political stance?

Is it possible for YOU to reconsider your assumptions on this situation and others by not turning to your usual news source first?

Is it possible to forgive even when YOU are the one wronged?

Is it possible for YOU to admit you might be wrong?

Is it possible for YOU to reach out and invest in truly knowing and understanding people, who look, think, believe, and experience things differently than you?

Is it possible to hope?

Is it possible?

Friday, March 28, 2014

Black and White


You know when he comes in the room.  The lighting completely changes, the shadows deepen, and somehow, the very air of the seems oppressive.  Ominous music plays from nowhere and then you see him.  Black hat, black clothing, and boots.  There are always boots.  All of these things point to him, but you could get rid of all of that and still know him by the eyes.  The eyes say it all.  Squinty.  Shifty.  Dark.   There's no doubt, once you see the eyes.


He is the bad guy.

Years ago, my daughter and I were watching some random kids movie.  If you have kids, you know these movies.  Terrible script.  Bad writing.  Awful acting.  Kid’s love them.  You watch them because your kid loves them.

“Dad, is that the bad man,” my daughter asks in all her innocence. 

“Yes honey, that’s the bad guy,” I answer somewhat offhandedly.  

But wait.  I stopped there.  I realized that perhaps I’ve just taught my beloved child a terrible lesson.

If you’ve spent any time knocking around this world, you learn very quickly that the “bad man” is rarely accompanied by menacing organ music.  The stage lighting doesn’t suddenly change and there is no chorus of gasps when they enter the room.

No, I can tell you as a Pastor, some downright evil people, people so evil that it affects you.  Like an oil slick on the surface of water, you can’t help but get some on you when you touch it.  

Some of the worst people I’ve ever dealt with have had a smile on their face as they stab you in the back.  I’ve seen people lie with so much sincerity that you’re left breathless when they turn on you.  I’ve watched folks who everyone placed on a pedestal turn around and hurt others in the most brutal ways.

It’s the politician who kisses the baby even though he just signed a bill that will leave the baby’s father out of work, and he knows it.  It’s the husband who abuses his family in the most heinous ways, but smiles at church and plays the good Christian.  It’s the teacher that everyone likes who turns out to be molesting kids.  It’s the person at work who schemes and lies for their own benefit, climbing the ladder over the bodies of their coworkers.  It’s the person who brings drama and bile into the lives of everyone she touches, as she plays one person off against another.  

I wish I could continue to tell my daughter that the world is divided nicely and neatly in to categories of good and bad, with the good guys always wearing white hats and the bad guys always wearing black ones.  I wish I could tell her that it was easy to avoid the evil ones.

But no, the truth isn’t in the black and white, but in the grays.
Even an oil spill can be pretty.  Have you ever seen the rainbow of colors on the surface of an oil slick?  Beautiful colors that can hide an appalling evil.

I can’t protect my daughter from the evil people in this world, but I can be honest with her that sometimes bad guys wear masks so good you can’t even tell they are masks. And sometimes the good guy comes out of nowhere and surprises you.

And sometimes, that oil slick of evil is going to stick to you, no matter how hard you try to wash it off.

Life isn’t as easy as a kid’s movie.

I wish that she never would have to learn that lesson.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Integrity



Integrity

That’s what bothers me.  Integrity.

Politics kills people’s integrity.

People I care about.  

People who I otherwise like and trust.

Democrats.  Republicans.  Friends that I like.  I care about them.  I don’t care about their politics.

I have friends on both sides.  Their politics are not a friendship test to me.

I could drop my wallet and know they’d give it back with no money missing.

I know I could leave my child with them and they’d keep her safe.

I  trust their integrity in many things.

But, open the politics door, and integrity flies out the window.

Why can’t my Democrat friends look at the Affordable Health Care Act and say, “It was wrong to use the tactics that were used, it was wrong to pile so much stuff in there, and it was wrong to pass something that wasn’t even read; my side was wrong.”?  No, they hoot and holler, cheering “My side won, screw you Republicans!”

Why can’t my Republican friends say, “There are people in dire need who cannot get insurance and suffer because of that.  We collectively must do something to help, and that may mean some sort of government involvement.”?  No, they stomp and fuss and compare the President to a dictator.

OR,
 
Why do the Republicans who wholeheartedly supported George Bush in all he did, including the war in Iraq, fuss about Barack Obama in Libya and Syria?

And the Democrats who hated all that George Bush was and were angry about Iraq, but have no complaint about Libya and Syria?

OR,

Why do Democrats excoriate the Republicans for balking on raising the debt ceiling and shutting down the government when President Obama voted precisely that way seven years ago during the Bush administration?

Why did the very Republicans who supported raising it in the past, suddenly care about the cost to our children’s future?

Why is it always the other group’s fault for not being willing to give something in compromise when your own side draws similar lines? 
 
Why does party loyalty remove all sense of honesty that your party doesn’t get it all right?

Perhaps this is why each side hates each other so?  A person who has compromised their own principals over politics, recognizes that same character in his opponent.

Where are the people of honor who can call out their own side?

Where are the ones with character enough to call out what’s right on the other side?

Where’s your integrity?

Signed,
A Modern Diogenes

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